Keep that sappiness away from me until I’ve had at least one cup of coffee or tea.

Timeline/World: Edge of Forever – Gifted Ones
Current Date: November 24, 2023

Character: Kazumi Eto
Race: Human – Meta
Age: 33
Current residence: Port-Vila, Vanuatu
 

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How did things tumble out of control the way they did? It has been a few months already and I still wake up in the morning and wonder how I did not see it. For years, we had been doing fine. For years, I had been the one they vented to as needing it—their friends were not truly friends and only seemed to see them as a butter of sorts; they were the one who offered for us to share living accommodations though I had already had the house I had been renting and they moved in with me since it was bigger with a larger yard.

For some years we lived together. I felt that they loved me as a friend would and I found myself returning that sentiment. We had been drawn together as we had been from the same school. There were—still are, as far as I am aware—a few others who also went to the school we did, who came here. I have no idea how it might happen; the school was not huge by any means, but it does seem as though we are drawn to our own.

Not that I spend any time with them. Their behaviour with my friend—ex-friend, I guess now—made it clear that I wanted little to do with them and I know that with my selective mutism, they would have seen that as the perfect excuse to try and get away with even more things that would not have ended well for me.

Instead of thinking too much about the fact that the house is now as quiet inside as it was when I first moved in—something I find myself not minding as much as I could, though I do somewhat miss the companionship—I spend more time in the garden as I tend to always do. It is my place and I still tend to it as it deserves; it is that one friend that will never truly leave me.

We were sitting around the breakfast table, and I was bringing them the usual plate of breakfast that we shared every so often; I set the plate down, offered them a smile as I’ve done thousands of times before, and I turned to go and get the two cups. Coffee for them, tea for myself. I barely had time to pick up both of the cups that they snapped at me; they told me that I had best keep my sappiness away from them until they’d had that first cup of coffee.

Now, there have been times when they have been grumpy in the morning. There are nights—were nights—when sleep was elusive for them, and they struggled to get a good bit of rest. The other times, it was because they did go out to locations that mattered little to me and did come home smelling somewhat of alcohol. I never held that against them.

On that morning, things didn’t happen quite in the way they had before and even without so much as an explanation, they went on a tirade about how I’m too touchy—I’m not, not really, the only times I might have brushed against them or touched them was while offering plates of food or helping with tasks—and about how I was just using them and—well, there was a whole lot to their anger that morning and I couldn’t understand most of the reasoning behind it.

Most of the things they accused me of were things I didn’t do. One of those accusations was about how I talked too much, too loudly, too crassly. It’s hard for me to even form words and here, at home, my selective mutism had eased somewhat, but just barely and only ever so while I was in the garden, and they were the one to initiate the discussion.

I don’t know what came over them. All I know is that within a few hours, they had packed up their clothes—everything in the house was mine—and they were gone. I didn’t even really have time to try and wrap my mind around anything. How was it that I was accused of being too sappy—I was bringing them their coffee—and how did that set everything off?

In a way, I suppose I may never know. I think that I might have expected them to come back just a few days later; maybe a week or three so that they would have time to blow off the steam that had clearly accumulated inside, but no. They’ve been gone; they haven’t reached out and I have no idea if they even still are here at all.

What can I do, truly? It feels like a betrayal of sorts, but I deal with it, at this point. I have work to do and while it isn’t truly work since it involves the gardens at a few different places, it still is work and I cannot spend my time brooding at home. I can live by myself if I have to.

Final Word Count: 850

I couldn’t have picked a better ally. After all, you’ve done everything I didn’t want to do.

 
Timeline/World: Edge of Forever – Gifted Ones
Characters: Kazumi Eto
Race: Human – Meta
Age: 31
Current residence: Port-Vila, Vanuatu
Final Word Count: 751 words
 

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There is a bitterness to betrayal I’ve never actually had to deal with, and I would like to never have to deal with it. Though I suppose that you could say that the school I went to has betrayed me most of all but is it really? I still don’t even know how we were selected, I don’t know why the school itself somehow seemed to have this one particular rule about only having male students on its campus.

I try not to think too much about it. There still are days, though now they are getting rare, and I am grateful for it, where I wake up, still believing I am this girl I had been born as. That is something the school took away from me, is it betrayal? I don’t know.

What I do know is that my housemate seems to have forsaken the idea of ever spending time with the few others from the school they had kept in touch with. The issue with their camping idea was one of the first big issues but there have been others since, and it has only gone downhill.

The mock-outing I offered them with the camping trip out in the yard had helped, however. It was terrifying to sleep in that tent though they allowed for the small glow of light in the tent, and it helped me sleep better. Darkness will never be a friend, no matter how much I might be tempted to agree to the idea. It ate my brother whole, and it changed my life in a way I never imagined possible.

The last straw—another failed outing that led to another morning of venting—turned out to be another almost camping trip but not quite. It was a long hiking afternoon where all five that had been supposed to be there indeed were but as it turned out, my companion ended up doing most of the hard work for them. Clearing out paths, picking up after them when they stopped for breaks. It was all little things, but I believe that it was the parting words of one of them that really sealed in the deal, so to speak.

The words might have been somewhat different but the anger in my friend was very present, so I believe they have heard things right. The so-called leader of the other little group of friends told them that they couldn’t have picked a better extra for their trip. They’d done everything he hadn’t wanted to and couldn’t have been bothered to.

In the end, if you look at it, I suppose you could say that they felt as though they’d been seen as nothing but a butler or something of the sorts and just, that really was the last straw. I can’t blame them. I’ve heard the stories more and more as they happened, and I have to give them that much; they have much more patience than I would have. Then again, I am not a people’s person and that they still allow me in their lives even though I am so quiet and keep to myself is something I cherish.

I can’t understand how people can treat others this way. Life is precious. As someone who has essentially lost himself and lost his brother, I know that you just need to be able to hold on to the little things that you have, you never know when anything might be taken away from you.

Maybe I’m just over-dramatic.

Maybe I’m just too in tune with the gardens that surround us and I’m out of touch with humanity that I don’t know how things are supposed to pan out, but I still can’t understand why anyone would treat anyone else so callously. If you don’t want someone to be your friend, tell them but don’t string them along and lead them to believe that they are friends when it is just stupidly clear that they aren’t.

We spent hours out in the garden last time. It wasn’t so much work, as they know that the gardens are mine to take care of and I take that duty very seriously but just spending time outside with the flowers, the still fresh air, a good sweet tea and quiet company, it was good for them and when we got back inside before the clouds became more than a mere passing shadow in the sky, they seemed to be doing better, so I’ll take that as a good thing.

You know, a true friend wouldn’t leave me out in the woods alone all night, and yet that’s exactly what you did.

 
Timeline/World: Edge of Forever – Gifted Ones
Characters: Kazumi Eto
Race: Human – Meta
Age: 30
Final Word Count: 720 words
 

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As they came together at the table to eat their breakfast, Kazumi knew something was wrong and for several heartbeats, he thought he might have been at the source of the issue but it only took one look from his companion for him to release that held back breath and feel his shoulders drop. Years together and still, the simplest of things worried him and left him to wonder if he just wasn’t at the source of everything that went wrong.

The time they spent at the breakfast table itself was quiet, but it was once they were side by side, quietly cleaning up their dishes, that his companion spoke up. Kazumi listened quietly as he tended to, letting the other vent as necessary and it did seem to be necessary.

Somehow, his friend had made plans with other friends from the mysterious school they all had gone to. They were supposed to spend an evening and night in the woods, camping for the sake of spending time out there in nature. Kazumi hadn’t heard of these plans and it was for the best, even if he had, he wouldn’t have wanted to go, not really. These things just didn’t sit well with him; he couldn’t handle the darkness, not after it had eaten his brother whole and, well, while it balanced out his ‘minor’ gift, he still didn’t really know these others from the school and he preferred not to go. He wasn’t sad that he hadn’t been asked to go.

However, upon getting to the meet-up spot, only one of the four that had supposed to be there—of their group of five—were really there. As it turned out, the other three had been caught elsewhere and couldn’t make it so it was down to only the two of them. The trip to get to the forested camping grounds had been long enough that his housemate and friend hadn’t really wanted to go back though he would have been fine to sleep in his car but instead they did set up their tents—the still-unnamed to him friend setting up his own, though it would have made more sense to only set up one instead of two.

They spoke for a while and then went to sleep. A few hours later, a sharp sound had woken him and he stepped outside of his tent to check it out but found out that he was alone. The other’s tent had been removed altogether and was missing as though it had never been there. Being without a proper light source, his friend had merely gone back to his tent to finish the night and, come early morning, made his way back to his car.

The drive had been spent trying to understand why the other who had invited him out to camping had left him alone in the woods. It made no sense. Friends don’t leave other friends out alone in the woods at night and Kazumi couldn’t help but shake his head once he’d heard the story.

By that time, they’d finished washing and drying the dishes, his friend still was fuming a little and Kazumi felt unable to do anything to help—not something he was fond of. With an exasperated sigh, he threw himself into the care of the plants as always and, eventually, came up with a solution that seemed to work out well for him. He knew that it wasn’t just about the camping experience, it was about being left behind in the forest but still, it was a small idea.

So as he worked a bit in the garden, he found a spot for them and saw to setting up the tent. A bit of camping in their own yard where it did get pretty intensely dark at night sounded like a good idea to him and, hopefully, it would ease some tension out of his friend to have someone not abandon him a second night in a row.

It would be a mildly uncomfortable sleep with the darkness trying to eat everything, but Kazumi figured that, just maybe, if he could indeed have his friend at his side, he’d manage well enough to sleep. It was a fear he was willing to face to make the other man smile.

How could an entire school disappear?

 
Timeline/World: Edge of Forever – Gifted Ones
Characters: Kazumi Eto
Race: Human – Meta
Age: 29
Final Word Count: 643 words
 

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I try not to think much about what happened when I was still a teen, still a girl. I try not to focus on being taken away from my home with little warning; my body changing inside and outside into that of a boy. I try not to remember the way my brother was swallowed whole by darkness in the blink of an eye, taken away from me forever.

I try not to but it’s not always easy to completely ignore that which has been with you for the longest of times. That which still haunts your nightmares and those nightmares are very much still there, clinging and hanging on, refusing to let go.

I still spend the vast majority of my waking hours tending to the garden. I’m grateful that we’ve settled in a place where there is no snow. I’m rather certain that if we had, I wouldn’t still be alive to this day. The nightmares of all that happened during my years at the school would have devoured me whole, leaving me little more than an empty shell. I’ve seen it happen in those very nightmares, I’m certain it could happen just in the same way.

Now and again, however, thoughts of my past, thoughts of what happened and of everything surface in my mind. Thoughts of things best left behind that still cling on, as though they somehow would find further cracks in my armour and chip away at what’s left of my sanity.

One of those particular thoughts is: what happened to the school?

I went there, I studied, I was ‘released’ back into the world but never once have I known where that school was truly located. Never once have I had an address to turn to. Never once… well no, that one is a lie. Perhaps in the first year or so, while I was struggling with my physical changes and the loss of my brother, the thoughts didn’t enter my mind much but once I had managed to somewhat settle, they became the norm. What of my parents? Did they worry about where we had disappeared off to? Did they know? Had they forgotten we ever existed?

In a way, it feels as though the school never existed in the first place. As though it was all a figment of imagination but I know that all these years of schooling were not just in my mind. I still rarely cross paths with others who went. My companion keeps better in touch with some of the friends they had made there. I admit that making friends wasn’t very high on my list and no one wanted a mute, broken boy for a friend.

So I end up asking myself. How could an entire school disappear? Did it not disappear but now that we’re done with our schooling, it is as out of reach for us as it was for the rest of the world who had no knowledge of it, it has slipped out of our reach? How did it all work?

The days when these thoughts make their ways up into my mind, I can rarely manage to focus on much of anything else. Those days are the ones I throw myself even more into the gardening, tending to gardens that are so big I still can’t wrap my mind around it. I’m certain that seen from above, people might wonder as to who tends to acres and acres of flowers, trees, well-trimmed grasses and who knows what else. It looks fit for royalty.

I think royalty isn’t too far off. My companion is worth being called royalty in my eyes. They’ve been at my side for years, caring for me and loving me in a way I feel I do not deserve but I cherish every moment and return the favour every day.

Why can’t you just rest for once in your life?

Timeline/World: Lost Boys
Characters: Kazumi Eto
Race: Human – Meta
Age: 27
Final Word Count: 623 words

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“Because these plants are not going to tend to themselves.”

This was not a new conversation, for the rare times Kazumi still found his voice. Though now, a decade after the disappearance—and death, he knew—of his brother into the darkness, and five years after he had left the mysterious school that had changed his life in more than one was, words had become easier. They were not commonplace, far from, but he was happy when he was in the garden, out in the sun, bringing together both of his loves and passions. It was easier to find words then, even if his throat at times constricted on him and made him choke on them.

Despite that it had been a decade since the change, there were days when he woke up and still believed he was the little slip of a teenaged girl he’d been when the school had found them, brought them in. That his body had changed on its own within the blink of an eye to that of a boy still sat poorly with him on certain days but he had adapted and accepted things. He almost preferred it this way though it had taken a lot of getting used to. He just couldn’t understand why it had seemed almost necessary for the school to only have gifted boys inside its walls. Did it help them to better focus? He doubted it; he had seen many couples roaming the ground and hormones were always palpable in the air.

Looking up to his companion a moment, he shook his head and waved his hand a little, a soft hint of laughter escaping him as he plants leaned towards his motions, as is waiting, expecting. He lowered his hand once more, fingers tenderly brushing along the petals of the blooming rose he was sitting in front of. Those flowers were the children he would never physically have and he treated them as such. Not so much because he couldn’t—he’d had sexual encounters and that particular part of him worked just fine but he wasn’t interested in having children, not when he had gardens the size of which he couldn’t wrap his mind around to tend to every day.

“Just don’t forget to come back inside for a while, the temperature is supposed to get really high.”

There was another gentle wave of the hand from Kazumi, a murmured acquiescence that yes; he would step inside after a while. He could already feel the heat of the sun’s light on him and he knew that he would need to seek the shade for a while. The shade, a large glass of cool water or tea and some down time. It wasn’t quite true that he never did rest. During storms he stayed inside, when it was dark he stayed inside, he just had a hard time sitting still but that was all there was to it. He loved what he did and that passion merely seemed to keep him going.

There was so much he had learned at that school but one thing he did wish he could have, was how to slow down. He did feel as though he always needed to keep moving but somehow he figured that had to do with his surroundings, he would have been more lethargic if he’d opted to live in a desert, or, heaven forbid, in a cave. The thought made him shudder and yet miss his brother for a moment. His brother was gone and not coming back and his discomfort around darkness had not faded at all over the years. This, too, was why he worked as hard as he did. Why he rarely rested unless it was at night.